validation

Wow. I’m on a regular blogging spree!! haha

Yesterday afternoon, which now seems like an eternity ago thanks to the insanity that is my daily life right now, I had a brief conversation with my stats professor about my final paper for his class. Nearly a month ago, I turned in an assignment that asked us to start on the analysis for that paper, and apparently I did a whole lot more than most of the people in the class. I went yesterday to get some feedback and guidance on finishing it up (although it’s not due until the 11/27, I am hoping I can knock it out this weekend).

While this class has been a significant challenge to me, I have done the single thing that will make a big difference when it comes time for him to turn in a grade for me, and that’s going to visit him in his office. I went at the beginning of the semester because I was really panicking about the appearance of calculus, and he helped calm me down a bit about that. And yesterday’s conversation went as well as I could have hoped.

For whatever reason (and probably it’s because I have really tried to understand the material this semester), this guy has really come over to my corner through the course of this semester. I can remember a year ago at this time, when I was starting to assemble my commissions database, going to talk to him and getting very little tangible help from him, only a few suggestions and warnings. Yesterday, by contrast, he was sending me raw datasets while I sat there. A year ago, I wanted to register for a harder stats class in another (sister) department, and was trying to convince our chair that I could prolong a major-field course until the fall so I could make it work in my schedule; this stats prof said he supported me in theory but wouldn’t go to bat for me. Yesterday, I mentioned that I wanted to take a harder stats class in another department but that my advisor was reluctant to let me because it conflicted with my TA assignment, and I got a completely, radically different reaction. I swear, I think he was starting to stand up, as if to indicate he would go fight for my right to take the class at that exact moment.

I know this seems like a small victory when looking in from the outside, but it’s really huge for me. Winning him over, however it is that I’ve managed to do so, is a MAJOR coup from my perspective. He will probably occupy the third place on my dissertation committee and thus be a critical factor in recommending me for hire when it comes time to go out on the job market. His advice is going to be pivotal in making a couple of papers I’m working on actually, well, *work*.

It was a short 45-minute meeting, but within that time, I got a huge sense of validation and encouragement.

And I am so glad.

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