a poignant paragraph from the book I’m reading

I now knew how pointless it was trying to pretend that I didn’t still feel something for her. It didn’t make sense to love her. I’d weighed the pros and cons a million times, and the results were always the same: I needed her. She was no good for me, she didn’t want me to be part of her life, but there was nothing I could do about how I felt. I loved her. I couldn’t lie to myself, though it was the one thing I wished I had the strength to do. I couldn’t forget about her. The passage of time had, if anything, made her more important than ever. I couldn’t replace her with another girl without constantly comparing them to her and finding them lacking. I couldn’t move forward and I couldn’t reclaim the past. I was stuck in an ex-lover’s limbo with nothing but happy memories to keep me company.

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