Newsweek is the unquestionable master at providing clever quips from the week before, with topics typically ranging from politics to pop culture. By contrast, US News & World Report can barely compete.
In the Nov. 1 issue, however, US News kicked it up a notch. Here are their quotes — all good!
“If Barbara gets her hands on John Kerry, he might get another Purple Heart.” — Former President George Bush, telling an audience that his wife is angry about Kerry’s attacks on her son, the president
“He is brain dead.” — Sen. Joe Biden, a Kerry backer, on President Bush
“Well, there was no sex for 14 days.” — Arnold Schwarzenegger, California governor, on how his wife, Maria Shriver, a member of the Kennedy clan, reacted to his speech at the Republican National Convention
“I don’t know that she’s ever had a real job — I mean, since she’s been grown up.” — Teresa Heinz Kerry, in comments about first lady Laura Bush, for which she later apologized
“I’m too lazy.” — Sen. John Kerry, joking about why he didn’t carry the goose he killed during an Ohio hunt