I’ve got a paper due today at 1 p.m. — or, roughly 3 hours from now. So I’ve taken refuge in the UTD library to write said paper. When I got here about 30 minutes ago, I had almost nothing written, but I wasn’t (and am still not) worried, as last week I came to the library with less than a page written, and had a pretty good 15-page paper done in less than three hours. This one’s a paltry 8-page assignment, so I have no worries. I’ve already got 2 or 3 pages done, and I haven’t been working all that hard, really. I mean, look! I’m blogging!
Most of my qualms about this paper have to do with the fact that my professor (and the only prof who’s really been something of a mentor to me since I started this program) basically told me two weeks ago that the idea has little merit. He says it’s okay for the purposes of this assignment and class, but that if I had any thoughts of moving forward with it, I probably won’t get very far. OUCH. He was being harsh because he knows it’s what I need, but that didn’t make it sting any less.
This is a nothin’ special assignment in a pass/fail class where, as my friend Nick likes to remind me, only 70% effort is technically required. I’m no slacker, but I also recognize that, if Tom’s right, this project is probably going nowhere, so I don’t see any great promise in pouring a lot of effort into the final product.
The real booger of an assignment comes with next week’s roughly 25-30 page paper … for which I really have NO TOPIC (OR IDEA). Frightening. I have continued to tell myself I’ll worry about that one when this one is all done and turned in, but as that’s now hours away, I can feel the slight rise of blood pressure associated with thinking about the bigger summer project. Argh!
I don’t know if there’s really anything in this post of general interest… honestly, I’m just killing time because this paper slightly bores me. The thing is, *I* think it’s really interesting and actually quite significant and important. I just feel somewhat burned by the whole thing because one professor didn’t like it. And I hate that my enthusiasm was so easily quashed. I’m going to have to get over that if I’ve got any hope of surviving in this field.